Live from the Gardens: The First Journey

This week on Live from the Gardens we change things up a bit and play a game of Choose Your Own Trivia! Brayden and Tessa compete in a rapid fire showdown to see who knows the most about the huge variety of animals that show up in Alternamorphs #1: The First Journey, the book we talked about last week.

Rivalries flare as we talk bone-chomping, businesses of ferrets, and so much more!

Hypothetical Question of the Week: if the Fanimorphs were part of the Animorphs gang, what would their roles be?


Alternamorphs #1: The First Journey

This week we, your esteemed sources of Animorphs discourse, talk about Alternamorphs #1: The First Journey, the first of the Choose Your Own Adventure Animorph books!

Our Host and our Newbie both only got one chance to make it through the adventure and, big surprise, they died almost immediately, although Brayden did do some good giraffe kicks before he lost.

This book is terrible and Mikael makes it clear that he hates it.


Live from the Gardens: The Forgotten

The Fanimorphs talk spider monkeys and jaguars in this episode of LIve from the Gardens about Animorphs #11: The Forgotten!

Monkey genitalia, jaguar spots, and so much more await you on this wild and eye-opening trivia quiz show about the morphs from last week’s book. Also, some surprising facts about monkey thumbs and what makes a black panther black.


Animorphs #5: The Predator

Marco finally stars in his own book in Animorphs #5: The Predator, just in time for Fanimorphs: The Dork-Bajir Chronicles to dissect it, piece by piece.

We ponder over Marco’s apparent Brooklyn accent, what 90s material Marco’s dad touches himself to, and the horror of being ripped apart. We’re your one-stop shop for accidental racism and constantly interrupting each other!


Live from the Gardens: The Message

This week in Live from the Gardens we talk about the Seagull and the Common Dolphin, the two main morphs from Animorphs #4: The Message.

Strap in for a lively discussion about how dolphin throats work, the best way to listen to man-made whale songs, and a breakdown of why seagull sex is stupid-looking. Also, Live from the Gardens now has quizzes and stuff!


Animorphs #4: The Message

Animorphs #4: The Message has a lot of poignant, character-building moments, most of which we tear down and humiliate in this episode of Fanimorphs: The Dork-Bajir Chronicles.

We mock the Animorph cover models, the absurdity of the term “great ones,” and the issue of consent when absorbing 13-year-old human DNA. Tune in this week for a deep dive into the perfect storm that is the fourth wave of the Animorphs series.


Live from the Gardens: The Encounter

This Live from the Gardens is centered around two morphs found in Animorphs #3: The Encounter: the Red-Tailed Hawk and the Gray Wolf.

We focus in on how Yeerks spot the subtleties of animal sex by watching Youtube videos, whether or not birds can smell, and Brayden achieves climax live on the cast. Also, buckle up for cloacal moaning, lifting your leg to pee, and how to see superteal!


Animorphs #3: The Encounter

The Fanimorphs sink their teeth into Animorphs #3: The Encounter and bite off a piece of perma-morphed Tobias’ mental health journey.

Get ready to cry some emotional tears as we recap our most tragic hero’s meanderings through coming to terms with his new hawk self and still contributing to Animorph missions. We go over such topics as Marco’s depression strength, Tobias’ general angstyness, and what it’s like to be the doves in a John Woo film.


Live from the Gardens: The Visitor

This week’s Live from the Gardens features the Fanimorphs gang discussing the Northern Short-Tailed Shrew and the Domestic Cat, as featured in Animorphs #2: The Visitor.

Listen in as we argue over the size of lizards and mice and wince at the details of feline reproduction. If you enjoy spiny genitalia and learning some really surprising things about shrews, stay tuned for more near-expert level animal talk.


Animorphs #2: The Visitor

We’re back for more! The gang discusses Animorphs #2: The Visitor in this week’s episode of The Dork-Bajir Chronicles, including such relevant details as how to terrorize a vice principal, what kind of beast it takes to scare a Yeerk, and the body horror of a Controller losing control.

Why do Controllers watch blank screens if they’re trying to blend in? What is the nature of morphing in relation to addiction? How did NO ONE see these kids morphing sick animals in the middle of the suburbs? Find out the answers to all these questions and more in this episode of The Dork-Bajir Chronicles!

Thanks for listening!